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1. This is what saved my teenage years.

Writer's picture: Beca MarlansBeca Marlans

Realizing this certainly worked for me to become the person I am today. Fear is something that we constantly deal with as human beings, it is one of the endless struggles within us. But knowing this, my fight turned into teamwork.



Being a teenager has been the best and worst moment of my life, although I could not say that I have lived so many years as to classify it as the worst or best years of my life, but they have been the most difficult. We are all clear (whether you are a teenager at the moment or not) that the puberty years are not only intense because our body is constantly changing, but we also begin the years where we begin to be aware of our identity. We begin to question ourselves and ask questions like "Who am I?" and many times if not all the time we do not know how to answer them...


We begin to feel new emotions that we have never had before, we begin to be aware of what is socially good, and we act on what we see in our social circles. They initiate certain pressures, stress, judgment and the most difficult, we feel lost and alone ...


I was one of those who lived it perhaps a little more intense than some and less intense than others, but I'm not writing this to compare who experienced more. Actually I'm telling you this because when I was a teenager I went through various emotional, mental, physical and spiritual situations where I ended up hating myself. I had eating problems, depression problems, falls, fights, I was demotivated even thinking about doing any type of activity and more things that I will share with you over time. Day after day it was the same fight and the same feeling of emptiness, and although on several occasions I tried to ask for help, I felt that no one was going to be able to give me the solution to stop feeling that way. Yes, I got to the point of even thinking that if I ended my life the problems would also end and no one else would have to deal with me.


Finally after a few months, I took the opportunity to take a break from everything that surrounded me and found a workshop that supported me in noticing what my greatest enemy had been and the reason why I felt like a failure:


My ego.

He was my greatest enemy during all those years that I felt lost.


¿What's that?



In our head there is a voice that always seeks to keep us safe, now this voice does not mean that it is good or bad, sometimes it helps us to grow and many times it hurts us. It is that voice that takes care of us so that something bad does not happen to us both emotionally and physically, it keeps us safe. It is that same voice that takes care of us not to burn ourselves with fire and that also takes care of us that we fail but ... usually when we feel that something is "harmful" it throws us these feelings of insecurity, mistrust, anxiety, judgment and it seems that there was not a little bit of internal value within us.


Another example is like when you want a love relationship, but the ego is the one who tries to avoid that they will break our hearts and then we start to think about all the variables that may exist in the future, until you better choose not to have the relationship because you are afraid or if you start it, you end up in situations like you were or were unfaithful, you allow yourself to be treated improperly, etc.


How many times do we want something and out of fear we prefer not to? Or, how many times do you say that you will start a new habit, something that you are interested in obtaining and after having thought twice, you lose all interest? or worse... How many times have you taken for granted that you have a certain "after"?

Well, since you know a little about him... I introduce you to the ego, it is important that you know that listening to your ego is one of the things that ends up putting us in situations that we DO NOT want in our lives but there is a part of it that keeps us alive and healthy and sometimes it helps us to have the best decision within an event that you are experiencing. To be able to identify it in you, you require some steps that some posts will take but you can start following this step:


First of all, you are going to need a notebook, a notebook where you can keep track of everything that we are going to work on together.


In the first pages you are going to write who you are, your story, how you see yourself, your strengths and weaknesses, identify your dreams and write why those dreams (it does not matter if it is one or twenty), write the impediment there is for whether to create them and from where that fear or pain begins. Perhaps it comes from some event that you have experienced, perhaps you saw something that made you feel this way, or perhaps you will realize that it was not even a dream or fear of yours but that of a person close to you. Write everything, what has hurt, what has given the most joy, absolutely everything that can come to mind about you. It is possible that at this moment you do not understand the activity well but little by little it will take shape ... you just have to trust. And if you are one of those who do not trust, do not you think that it is the best time to let go of that fear and throw yourself like fat on a slide?


¡See you next week!


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@elclubdebeca

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